Category: Shifting Perspectives Written by Sofia Falcone Views: 1954
Not too long ago I wrote two articles (one on Abortion and one on Gender Ideology). Someone;on one of my female groups; wrote to me after reading those articles. Her lengthy and less than cordial comment made it clear how unhappy and disappointed she was with me; accusing me of turning on my “sisters” and how by writing those pieces I was doing harm to the movement. After reading her post I too felt sad, not because I had disappointed this particular soul but because I recognized how more and more people have blurred the lines and cannot longer differentiate between what it is to be a feminist and what a radical is.
Back when I was studying Political Science & Criminology, was when I first came to understand the term “Feminist”. My beliefs didn’t start then, those were always there, I just didn’t have a proper term for them. I grew up somewhat afraid of the term “Feminist” due to its stereotypical connotations. However; as I came to learn its history, I understood the great difference between what it is to be a Feminist vs. a Radical Feminist. Radical Feminism is a PERSPECTIVE shared by “some” within Feminism that calls for a radical reordering of society in which “male supremacy” is eliminated in all social and economic contexts; nowadays with “Gender Ideology” this also extends to biology. Radical Feminism promotes the resentment for men under the guise of seeking equality. True Feminism seeks equal rights; they do not seek payback, imposition, distortion or punishment.
“Feminism involves the idea of equal treatment in all aspects of life between all sexes and refusing to be subordinate to those who demean them due to their sex. True feminists don’t seek to bring others down, they want to see the world be a better and equal place. Feminists strive for equality, it’s that simple”
Feminism divides itself in waves and those waves have branches. The 18th century was its first wave. It is there were the cradle of True Feminism lies and its true ideologies. It sought the right to vote, to have equal opportunity to education and to be able to inherit. Over time the feminist movement evolve seeking equality in divorce, pay etc. However, in the 1960/1970s feminism got mixed with Marxism, this is when Social Feminism rose or Social Contemporary feminism. It is then Feminism started to branch off even more. Having said that, it is not until the third wave–mid 1990’s to the present –when Radical Feminism started to take place. This third wave has also come to involve the promoting of abortion, the denying of gender and the constant blaming or demeaning of men. Even Socialist Feminists reject radical feminism’s main claim that patriarchy is the only, or primary, source of oppression of women.
International women day, was a day to celebrate women, all they endured and how far we have come from the “Dark Ages”. It was a day to bring forth our concerns and to discuss productive potential outcomes and how to go about them in a way that was as fair as humanly possible to everyone; regardless of gender. Recently, this beautiful occasion has become more and more a “male hating” parade; where males are blamed for everything wrong within our world. The insulting and demeaning of men seems to echo throughout the entire thing, while many violent radical behaviors have been kept quiet through intimidation or because exposing them “would not support the cause”. That is NOT what Real Feminism is about; that is ignorance from some people who choose to ran away from their own demons and find it easier to blame the entire male population. It is also the result of well funded agendas at play. Real Feminists DO NOT support nor have ever condone such atrocious behavior, anymore than we would approve when some males blame women for everything.
What I am saying here is not an exaggeration. Seeing such behavior a couple of times, it can get one’s curiosity risen. Seeing it a bunch of times, it becomes obvious that these are more than just coincidences. When you see such behavior or ideologies being promoted constantly, it discards the previous two conclusions and it would be a mistake not to talk about the subject. After all, True Feminism always welcomed debate vs imposition.
I, like many of my feminists friends or my gay/lesbian friends agree that constructive criticism is never wrong, for it helps maintain balance. To constructively criticize something, doesn’t mean one hates the other view, it doesn’t mean one seeks to silence the other; it simply means one is bringing forth “fallacies” to the light and having those examined through critical thinking and properly channeled emotion vs. uncontrolled emotion and unsupported facts, or facts where only part of the information is made public.
As a True Feminist, I cannot stand by the blaming of a whole gender for the atrocities committed by some. I am thankful enough to have been blessed with a critical and open mind, as such I do not consider myself someone easy to be manipulated by what is “popular” and fed by the media. I have encountered people who have tried to use my past (the chapters of my life in which I endured abuse) as supporting evidence that “men” are the problem. However, I do not seek to ran away from my pain, as such I know what was done to me wasn’t done by all men; it was done by monsters who happened to be mostly male. I will not allow my traumas to be used against me to fuel any agenda or dogma. To ran away blaming everyone, seeking vengeance is the easiest route; I am a feminist, which means like those who believe and understand Real Feminism, I know easy isn’t always right.
It is very worrisome to see the quick annihilation of True Feminism sought forth by Radical Feminism. It is very worrisome to see so many people confuse one with the other. It is also very worrisome to see so much propaganda blaming a whole gender for everything wrong in this world…how is that not hate? What is worst, is how more and more people all over the world, on social media applaud such atrocious ideas as if they were ideals.
I am in complete agreement that an abuser (be it male or female) should pay for what was done, that is called justice. What isn’t justice is to blame men in general for the actions of some. To promote untruthful messages such as:
- ”if it wasn’t for men, the world would be a better place”
- "men are the reason the world is as it is”
- ”men are sick”.
I could challenge each of those statements by saying; how is the world going to be better when Radical Feminism is acting in the same oppressive way the old patriarchal system did? (2) The world is as it is because of all of us, not just one side. To put all the blame on men, isn’t mature thinking; it is immaturity and being evasive (3)Both men and women can exposed “sick” behavior. Men should not abuse women, women shouldn’t abuse men. Men should not use women and women should not seek to use men.
I often hear women telling men whenever such general hateful comments are made… “don’t worry about it, it’s not like they are talking about you”. Let’s take a minute to analyze how would we as women feel if the tables were turned. Have we forgotten how it used to be? How can we expect men not to feel insulted or belittle with such generalized connotations? Why should they not take it personally, after all the propaganda clearly says “men” not “the people who did this act” “the abuse committed by this person or persons”; I think its’ clear to say that when people use the term “men” in a sentence, they are referring to exactly that “men”, the whole gender.
More and more this twisted ideology that men are a threat simply because they are born male is being promoted; incentivizing to be discriminated simply because they were born as such. That is not justice or the seeking of equality, that has a name; it is called sexism. Let us not ever forget, not one person will ever represent an entire group. To make generalizations against men is no different than when those who believe in the old patriarchal system accused women of being the root of all problems; generalizations are ignorance talking.
True Feminists understand just like there are women who know what it is to own your own power, your own sexuality, your own independence; there are those whose actions only feed the illness already present in some people. Those particular women do not represent the liberal, true feminist, anymore than the radical feminists do. In the same way within men, there are those who would not ever condone the abuse of a woman by another “man”. There are those who understand women are not to be blamed for the ignorance found in the world nor do they care to partake in abusing women as sexual objects or in any other way. There are men who are “MEN” and care to have a partner not a sex toy or a servant but an EQUAL in the cultural sense: Economically (both contribute), mentally (both can have conversations with meaning, depth, joy) , spiritually (both can grow as people) and sexually (uninhibited sexuality where not one partner is using the other to gain something).
Do we really believe that if a “man” who was ready to commit an abuse, were to tell all other men what he was about to do, every other man would simply stand by and watch? Why then are Radical Feminists so eager to use such generalizations and why are we as members of this society tolerating such propaganda.
I was ask as a Feminist where do I stand. I think by reading the above you get the idea but I will write down a few facts based on this modern Radical agendas being pushed for you to consider and I will also leave my input on those matters. All of these are being pushed forth under the new radical feminist movement.
- Gender Ideology.– I do not support any agenda which seeks for people to deny anatomy, biology, neuroscience, etc. In other words, an agenda that seeks to promote DELUSION. Men are born men and women are born women (physiologically). That is not something we can just close our eyes and train our mind to deny, for that would be the promoting of a falsity, an error in thinking and fomenting mental disorders (delusions). I also do not believe anyone has the right to judge whom a person chooses to love. I respect people based on who they are; it matters not if they are gay, lesbian, transgender, for they are human, just like I am. No one should ridicule them, disrespect them, belittle them, etc. I am against the fomenting of an ideology to children who are yet to determine their path. Promoting this new agenda is no different than forcing boys and girls to be heterosexual. What the media doesn’t seem eager to show is how promoting this new agenda is badly affecting higher numbers of children than it is protecting. What they don’t show is how countless of doctors and psychologist have shown the rise in depression and personality disorders due to severe confusion. What they also don’t show is the tremendous funding by pharmaceuticals behind this new agenda, and how many doctors have expressed their concern at the idea of giving a child hormone blockers because “the child made the decision” to change his or herself. Later on this children (the majority of them) have personality trauma, extreme depression and high suicide rate. Why? because they felt imposed on by people who think thought they knew better. Why not let kids be kids? Why not protect our children and teach our children to respect those who are different instead of promoting an agenda which is just as dogmatic as the patriarchal one. Billions are being funded towards this new idea that we are not male or female. How about using that money to deal with the roots of the issues, instead of supporting a delusion. To me those who support this new agenda have obviously seen what the media wants them to see but don’t know the repercussions mentally and physically that are to come. The media is not eager to show or promote those experts who have spoken about the side effects; for which there is extensive data available from doctors, scientists, psychologists, and even former radical feminists who have seen first hand what this “new” system is doing to children and adolescents.
- Pro-Life.- I do not support abortion; not because of any religious belief but because I have seen the repercussion mentally on the women who have had it. Since abortion was legalized in the United States, there has been more “casualties” than during the second world war. I am pro choice in the sense that a woman should be able to choose to get pregnant or not. Why not spend those billions on planned parenthood (birth control) and on proper sexual education. Why are they not so eager to teach young people the psychological and physiological ramifications vs. promoting a procedure which has proven time and time again to scar women. Abortion, makes women a tool; why do I say this? Because anyone who tells you abortion is free, it has no cost, is not telling you how much of tax payers money go to it. Neither are they being open about the immense funding given to them by NGO’s. That information isn’t kept hidden, it is disclosed as stated by law; however, most people don’t’ care to research it. There are over 67,000 abortion clinics all over the world, that is more than twice the amount of all McDonalds’s in the world. Since when are billions spent on something which is supposed to not give back any profit? This is not “conspiracy” is basic economics. Since when do corporations invest billions for nothing. As a therapist I will not ever support abortion, because I have witness women’s pain, doubt, rage and the masks they wear after the fact to tell themselves they are ok. NEITHER will I ever put down any woman who has ever gone through it or is thinking about it, for I do not live in their shoes. Therefore I would rather see such funding go towards the root as to prevent women from having to ever need an abortion than to fund the aftermath and benefit from it.
- Men Are the Problem.- Most people don’t seem to know Feminist Movements who do not support the above mentioned agendas, are finding it harder and harder to get any funding while Radical Feminist groups seem to have an easier time doing so. Why is that? I don’t think after all I have written, it is necessary for me to explain that part any further. Within this radical movement there are a few more things True Feminism doesn’t agree with. A) Feminist sought Economical equality. Real Feminists fought against the injustice that a woman could not divorce, could not inherit, could not leave a marriage and have some financial support to help with raising children and the fact that she had been kept from working. Real Feminism never sought to economically abuse men; taking the ratios to the other extreme, where a woman can economically walk away from a divorce not on “equal” terms but leaving a man basically with nothing or the mere minimum and calling it their “right”. That is not what Feminism ever stood for, much less during our times, where a woman has the right to choose whether or not she wants to pursue an education or whether or not she wants to work. Feminist take pride in equality, what is currently being done is not something to be proud of. B) Feminists sought equality to enter the job market, they did not seek to try to deny certain differences already set in place randomly by nature. Let me explain this further. In the Nordic countries (who are the pioneers of equality within the job market) they noticed within some careers men to women ratio were very much imbalanced. As such they offered economical incentives such a free education for those specific careers, free or almost free workshops to attract women into those branches. What they found is this: During the times they offer such funding, the ratio of women getting educated in male dominated fields were higher; however, once it came to entering the job market the ratio decreased, as many women chose not to. Once they took the incentive away the ratios went back to pretty much what they were before. What this proved was that certain careers are preferred by women and others not. Biologically this makes sense, as it has to do with white and gray mass matter in the brain. Women are born with more white matter, which makes them “better” at certain things where men would not be able to excel. Likewise men excel at other careers where women have troubles because they do not have as much gray matter. This does not mean one is better than the other, we are simply physiologically different. Sometimes a woman may be born with more gray matter, as such she finds it easier to excel at careers often male dominated; the reverse can happen for a man where he would find it much easier to excel at a career often female dominated. What Real Feminists were seeking wasn’t preferential treatment over men. They were not seeking to be given a job simply because they were females. They sought equal opportunity, that’s it; meaning, the job should be given to the person better qualified for the position regardless of gender, so long as “equal opportunity” had been provided. Feminists sought and seek equal remuneration, that meant a female who is “qualified” for the job, should not ever be payed less and treated worst simply because she is a woman. On the other hand Radical Feminism is seeking equality in all areas but without merit or qualifications; simply because they are women; so the “departments” can say they are being equal and fair. That is not what Real Feminism is; that is masking a problem. In reality is making a mockery of what Real Feminism stands for. For no Real Feminist would ever take pride of being given preferential treatment for simply being a woman. Such conduct would be no different than a man getting payed higher simply because he is a male. C)“men kill women”; monsters kill women. No person should killed another except when there is no other choice and one’s life is endangered or the life of another; regardless of gender, religion, race, economical status. “men kill women” is used as a blanket statement which blames a whole gender. One could argue that 80% of homicides in the world affect men. Violence towards women (whether by a man or another woman) is often caused by other factors, such as alcoholism, drug addiction, sexual addiction, mental illness, etc. Instead of investing so much on the promoting of hate towards another gender should we not be looking at the root causes of those problems? Men who have those addictions or a mental illness are the ones abusing women. Similarly all around the world many women abuse their own children; also the result of the already mentioned above. Does it mean every woman should be represented and treated the same as the one who behaved like a monster?
I hope this article; although extensive helps to clarify the differences between Feminism and Radical Feminism and where I stand in the whole thing. I love Feminism precisely because it has strength to recognize one thing from another. It does not seek revenge but equality. It does not seek to punish, it seeks to be understood and treated fairly. It is strong enough not to allow itself to be manipulated, and impartial enough to defend members of the opposite sex if and when needed. Being female, should be something to be proud about, our freedoms were earned not given easily, we should remember that. But we should remember that not as cause for hate and retribution but as cause for celebration; as reason to stand up if ever our freedoms are threatened again. What the women before us fought for, should not be tainted by radicals who seek to treat males as convicts who need to be punished simply because they are male. I believe women are strong enough and smart enough not to let themselves be manipulated by modern agendas which seek to taint everyone woman not as a feminist but as man hater.
I AM a feminist, and I wrote about this knowing my fellow feminists will not have a problem with it; they will not feel belittle or violated, for Real Feminists do not like or appreciate dogma. Not to challenge this new radical behavior would have been wrong. To allow myself to be silenced by those who erroneously think that to defend males is to betray feminism, would have been to allow everything the Feminist Movement ever stood for be tainted by a group of dogmatic radicals, who are more concerned with revenge than equality. I am a feminist, what I am not is an extremist.
I passionately believe one person can make a difference. I write from my own experiences and interests. It is my greatest hope that by writing about my own challenges and hopes, others may feel inspired to believe more in their inner power and to fully embrace themselves.
Reprinted on crystalwind.ca with permission from Sofia Falcone.
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