A+ A A-

A Buddhist Way to Celebrate Valentine’s Day

buddha valentine

Around 2,500 years ago, the Buddha left his family to go on a journey to eradicate suffering for himself—and everyone else—once and for all.

It doesn’t sound very romantic, right?

Maybe not, however, his decision that day changed the course of his life forever—and ours. What the Buddha had achieved after leaving his family can inspire us to celebrate Valentine’s Day in a more mindful and different way.

Buddhists don’t accept romantic love the way we do. For them, there’s one universal love that is given toward all human beings—and not an intimate love felt for one person.

Lama Yeshe puts it in a witty way:

“Ordinary love is narrow, closed-minded, and fickle. As long as your love is ordinary, your narrow mind will keep singling out one object: ‘you’re the only one for me; my only object of love and compassion.’

This Earth contains countless atoms, but you choose only one: ‘I love this atom.’ That’s such a silly mind; completely silly. There are countless atoms throughout all of space but tied by attachment your squeezing mind chooses only one. Then, whenever you encounter another atom, you feel insecure.”

As Lama Yeshe explains, our focus is constantly aimed at one person—one atom. If we are in a relationship, we expect so much from one person and focus solely on them. And if we are single, we might feel lonely and wish there was one atom on which we could focus our love.

It might be challenging to find a “middle way” when it comes to love, since it’s an intense emotion reinforced with mental activity. Nonetheless, reflecting on what the Buddhists believe can help us love differently.

In the eyes of a Buddhist, maitrī is authentic and pure love. It means to feel compassion, kindness, goodwill, and love toward all human beings, equally, without any exceptions—including our partners.

I’m not saying we should leave our partners like the Buddha did to focus on the rest of humanity, but the Buddha’s story is a motivation to broaden our perspective and distribute our love equally to all.

In real life, this is rather challenging, since our love tends to be conditioned and driven by our ego. Valentine’s Day may cause misery for some, because we expect too much from one single person. When we forget about other people, or atoms, we indirectly apply too much pressure on our partner—simultaneously they feel pressured too.

Anything in which we pour an excessive amount of energy can lead to harm. I like to compare the love inside us to a bottle of water. If we pour an entire large bottle into one single glass, the water will spill over. But if we distribute the water equally in many glasses, all glasses will be well-filled without water overflowing.

If we wish to celebrate love on Valentine’s Day (and every day) the Buddhist way, we should practice maitrī. Radiating love to everyone—regardless of what we receive from them—is miraculous. By all means, there are degrees to our love. What we give our partners might be more special, unique, or more intense, but we still remember others.

How can we distribute the love within us? When we see others as ourselves, it’s no longer tough to give them something. So long as there is a “me” and a “you,” we will never be able to move beyond the barriers of our minds. What is separated from us is naturally our enemy. This is why reflecting on oneness is of great benefit.

Buddhists call this bodhicitta, or awakened heart/mind—a mind that is fully dedicated to others. According to Lama Zopa Rinpoche, it might be the best medicine for all our illnesses. What does this mean? It means to let go of the thought of “I”—the false sense of self—so we can be able to cherish others. In Buddhism, bodhicitta means to seek enlightenment for the sake of others. It’s the source of liberation and happiness.

That said, we can make it our purpose to bring happiness to other human beings and alleviate their suffering in any way possible. But it isn’t possible when we are attached to only one person. If we try to practice maitri or develop the bodhicitta mind, I’m convinced it will automatically transform our romantic relationships.

When we focus on different atoms, our love for our partner won’t be rooted in neediness attachment. We inevitably bring space into our relationship. Consequently, our partner can also work on developing bodhicitta.

Filling other people’s glasses from our inexhaustible bottle will, in fact, transform all our relationships.

Author: Elyane Youssef

CrystalWind.ca is free to access and use.
Please support us with a small gift of $11.11 or $22.22 or $33.33. 
Thank you! 
ॐ Namasté - Blessings!
"Life is an echo, what you send out comes back."

© 2008-2021 crystalwind.ca. All rights reserved.

  Please buy us a coffee!
Pin It

Free Reading Here!!

Cut Through The Illusions!
Available On The
Apple  / Android / Amazon
NEW Expanded Version - 53 cards!

Articles: Buddhism

Who is Online Now

We have 1498 guests and no members online

Featured This Month




The Focus And Study Stone Fluorite helps to assimilate ideas and informatio... Read more

Spring/Ostara 10 Minute Guided Meditation Fo…

Spring/Ostara 10 Minute Guided Meditation For Growth, Grounding & Positive Thinking

Welcome to this 10 minute guided meditation to help welcome the Spring Equin... Read more

The Ash Tree - February 18 - March 17

The Ash Tree - February 18 - March 17

Celtic Symbol : The Trident Or Sea - Horse Zodiac Degrees : 28º00` Aquarius... Read more

Pisces Mythology

Pisces Mythology

The Mythology of Pisces By most accounts, the mythology of Pisces follows a... Read more

Big Winds Moon

Big Winds Moon

Cougar -  Turquoise -  Plantain -  Blue and Green February ... Read more

Birth Totem - Wolf

Birth Totem - Wolf

Birth Totem Wolf Birth dates: February 19 - March 20 Birth Totem: Wolf Cl... Read more



The Stone of Truth Aquamarine can provide a significant boost to the immune... Read more



Plantain Helps you feel grounded Gender: Feminine Planet: Venus Element: Ea... Read more

The Folklore and Mythology Surrounding Crick…

The Folklore and Mythology Surrounding Crickets

Crickets "A Loud Cricket means Money is Coming" When it comes to Chine... Read more

Sun in Pisces

Sun in Pisces

Sun in Pisces February 22 through March 20 An Overview of Sun Sign Characte... Read more

Cartomancy - Fortune Telling Using Playing C…

Cartomancy - Fortune Telling Using Playing Cards

Cartomancy is the act of divining using cards. Divining means to find out by... Read more



Easter gets its name from the Teutonic goddess of spring and the dawn, whose... Read more

Spirit of White Tiger

Spirit of White Tiger

Spirit of White Tiger Role: Seeker of Personal Truth Lesson: Power of Conv... Read more

Spring Equinox - Ostara

Spring Equinox - Ostara

Celebrated on the Spring Equinox, around March 20-21 each year. Ostara is a... Read more

Crystal Gem: Grids and Gridding

Crystal Gem: Grids and Gridding

What are Crystal Gem Grids? They are tools for empowerment, for blessings, ... Read more

© 2008-2020 CrystalWind.ca. Site Creation by CreativeInceptions.com.

Right Click

No right click