Category: Inspired Mind Written by Michelle Maros
I’ve recently been in a handful of conversations with people on the topic of loneliness. It seems that the feeling of being lonely is prevalent for so many, and there is so much uncertainty over how to handle it and what it even means to fee lonely or be alone.
I believe there is a lot of misunderstanding and unnecessary judgment about being alone and feeling lonely. We tend to think that it signals there is something wrong with us, and we aren’t worthy of companionship or company, and that somehow we have failed.
There is a distinct difference between being alone and feeling lonely. The first, is simply the absence of company, and quite literally being in solely with yourself. The second, a more complicated emotion, is what bubbles to the surface due to a wide array of circumstances in life, leading us to feel uncomfortable feelings.
I know that loneliness is not always easy to work through, and so many of us have been grappling with it over these past few challenging years.
This week, I wanted to share three simple, but meaningful reminders about loneliness. I hope they help!
Remember that you won’t feel this way forever. Loneliness, just like every other emotion, both positive and negative, will not last. Whenever I find myself feeling down or sad about being alone, it’s so helpful for me to remember that it eventually will pass.
Remember that sometimes there are silver linings to being in your own company. I am someone who used to really not like being alone, but I have to say, I’ve grown to actually love it. I relish the time that I can spend by myself. So much of the world has been turned upside down, what better time to come back home to yourself, to get to know yourself on a deeper level, to tap into your creative desires or long-lost hobbies, and to really become your own best friend. Last week, I spoke on the topic of self-love, and this is where this comes into play. Treat yourself like you would someone you love and cherish, because you deserve that, too.
Remember don’t take your loneliness, personally. Often times when I’m feeling separated from the world, it’s easy for me to write stories that blame myself for my loneliness. This can look like, “people don’t want to be with you anyway,” “you’re not worthy of someone else’s company,” “you’re going to be alone forever.” These negative and self-sabotaging stories are sticky for the mind, and so, so easy to fall into. Don’t allow it. When you notice that you are feeling particularly lonely, train yourself to become extra aware of the stories your mind starts to tell you, and nip the nasty ones in the bud. Being alone says nothing about your worthiness or capacity for love, it just means that you get the space to love and honor yourself.
I hope these reminders serve you as we continue to move through these challenging times. If nothing else, I hope you find comfort in knowing that even though we are apart, we experience all these emotions, together.
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