How to Make Space for Uncomfortable Feelings
- Details
- Written by Linda L. Nardelli

Inner peace comes with making space for uncomfortable feelings, which is a deepening process of accepting and welcoming all facets of you and opening your heart to the experiences of others. It’s really about allowing all experiences to be your guide.
But how can you appreciate the inner guidance of feelings such as fear and anger when family and society teach you that anger is destructive, and fear is a weakness?
How do you welcome discomfort when conditioned to avoid or reject it?
And, how do you make space for the pain in yourself and others without feeling dragged down?
You welcome it!
In my healing counselling practice, I witness and support many people struggling to control their feelings and sensitivities. Therefore, they end up also holding back their inner knowing.
People hold back because they fear the unknown but holding back only serves to project the past onto the present moment, lessening the impact of what is truly possible.
By slowing down and making space for uncomfortable feelings, something amazing happens. You stop holding back and become curious, willing, and therefore able to hold space. Your curiosity becomes your ally.
With an open mind and open heart, you develop a process of self-inquiry that elicits a whole new way of perceiving reality and brings about forgiveness, acceptance and deep inner calm.
Getting up close to the unease is calming because it welcomes unexpressed emotions, soothes unmet needs and taps into the soul of one’s felt senses. Your feelings then are no longer alone, dismissed and minimized.
Rejection, withdrawal, disassociation, and reaction are not calming. But on the other hand, being curious about denial, withdrawal, disassociation, and reaction is calming.
You welcome discomfort by breathing into the pain and realizing that you can manage your trigger; you are the witnessing self who can observe reality without judgment, without contracting and pulling away.
It hurts to pull away and hide. It’s profoundly painful to hold back and deny. Being present, on the other hand, is freeing.
Being braced against feelings and in denial and avoiding pain creates a contraction in your energy field that impedes the flow of abundance and love.
As the non-judgmental witness holding a sacred loving space for unease, you position yourself for fulfillment because you are open and willing.
Channeled message
Masiandia: “Anything that triggers you is a catalyst, a guiding force meant to elicit your full attention so that you can open your senses and awaken to love.
“Whatever activates you is in direct correlation with your core beliefs and meant to bring those beliefs to the surface of your awareness so that you can heal and grow your sense of self-value.
“Ultimately, your soul is yearning to be chosen – for you to cease trying to measure up to an externalized idolized self and instead value who you are as you are.
“In this way, you learn to cherish all your life experiences, the good and the struggle. As a result, you develop a healthy relationship with fear, anger, hurt, loneliness and shame, and thus return to balance. In addition, you sustain your aspirations and dreams because you stay in self-belief.
“Please understand that you are not the victim of circumstance, not the casualty of discord or at the mercy of other people’s expectations. That is indeed an illusion! You are free to choose the life you want, be your own person, and follow in the footsteps of your inner resonance. You can only do so in love.
“Resistance, rejection, complaining, venting, and fighting against reality is not loving. Making space for resistance and holding the hurt, sorrow, anger and fear in a loving embrace changes the course of your life.
“Now is the time for change. This age of chaos is a time for change. So rejoice – let change happen to you, through you, for you.
“Be the catalyst for change by falling in love with all of you.”
Mystical Intimacy is available in print and e-book
at Amazon.ca and Amazon.com
and also at Banyen Books in Vancouver
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