Have you ever sent an email and the moment you clicked on Send; you realized it wasn't really what you meant to say and you may have just created a mess? Welcome to the world of Shoot, Ready, Aim. It shows up in all areas of life, relationship, business, health... everywhere. It is an awkward way to live your life and you can choose otherwise...

How did that happen (again)? 

After you clean up your mess, apologize profusely, and humbly crawl away, you might begin to look at the circumstances that created this. If you rewind the tape and look, you will most likely see that you were outside of the neutrality of the fourth dimension and very much in the reactionary third dimension. You were reacting to an external stimulus from a future-past attention point, charged with an emotional variation of fear. In other words, a situation presented itself that was similar to a past event, which triggered a strong, negative emotion and a desire to not let it happen again. Then you shot.

Ron was a geeky kid in high school before it was cool. He was the one the other kids attacked and bullied. He grew up isolated, on-edge and feeling taken advantage of. As an adult, managing his own online retail business, one day Ron received an email from a new customer that triggered his Shoot, Ready, Aim. This customer praised his book and said she made copies of the PDF and sold it to her friends. Ron‟s past taken-advantage-of picture was triggered, he felt emotionally bullied again and reacted immediately to defend himself and stop all future instances of this “blatant theft and personal attack.” He immediately replied in a strong, reactive way.

How do I stop my Shoot, Ready, Aim?

Observe. What else could be happening here? Most of the time, our first, charged, assumptions are incorrect. Most of us do not even stop to think or step back and look at the larger picture. We are so invested in protecting ourselves we assume the worst (thus the theme of this article).

Do your research. Look this person up in your database and on the internet. Get a sense of what motivates her. You might discover that she is a well-connected networker and her distribution may actually benefit you. Do not assume they are out To get you. Most “transgressors” are healers and fixers and want to share all their new discoveries with their friends, whether the friends are asking for this or not. Most importantly: Ask yourself, “What is triggered within me?” You drew this situation to you (It‟s that darn, Law of Attraction again) to continue to work on that past, charged picture, and reach a personal, powerful balance with it. This is really all about you after all.

Choose. Take a moment and intentionally identify two or three options. There is no need to respond to this charged situation today. Remove yourself from the situation and use your tools to find your space and get neutral again. Leverage this moment for your own growth toward elegance and 1+1 = 3. There may be a hidden gem here for you both.

Once you have identified a few options of response, look at how to present each one in the kindest, most neutral way. How you respond to this will demonstrate to that other person who you truly are. And don‟t you always want to vibrate at Certainty, Presence, Powerful and Gracious no matter what happens around you?

Act. Wait until you are in a calm space again to act. Anything done when off-balance will result in something you will not like and have to clean up. Acting may mean simply asking a clarifying question. “I‟m sooo glad you are enjoying my book. And I‟m confused. Do you mean you printed and distributed my book and charged for it? Hmmm - I don‟t understand. Did your PDF copy not have the copyright blurb on it? What does „sold, mean?” Most times, when you ask these questions, the person will realize they are out of integrity and ask how to make it good.

When we Shoot, Ready, Aim we may be missing the very next step to our own success.

Next Monday: Are You Losing Your Friends?

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