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The Sweet Deliciousness Of Destruction

The Sweet Deliciousness Of Destruction

This is a strange topic that mostly we do not talk about directly because firstly we really don’t understand it and secondly it scares us. This is the topic of destruction. Is it okay to destroy? Is it okay to enjoy it? Well, all we have to do is watch children at the beach or in sand boxes totally destroy their sand castles to understand that it is in our nature to destroy and yes it can be fun. Ticket sales are huge for movies where whole cities get destroyed, cars and trucks are smashed, boats and planes explode and so on. Some people love to go to the dump and hurl their old stuff off a ledge smashing them to smithereens. Destruction of course has a tragic face as well and when it involves loss of life we are horrified. Here we are going to delve into this topic a little deeper to understand it better.

Destruction for us humans is often symbolic and so since much of the destruction on film is computer generated, people can enjoy the destruction on screen without feeling guilty or bad that they are participating in actual destruction. People have a need to destroy aspects of their lives that are outdated or that they have moved beyond. Some people actually enjoy burning their old clothes, shredding their old papers and the like. They like the finality of destruction. “I will smash this old computer so I cannot keep it around hoping to fix it one day. Now it’s destroyed and I never have to worry about it again.”

In many respects these are healthy expressions of destruction because they free us up or at least help us to feel free. There are however other levels of destruction we engage in that are neither healthy nor are they totally negative. We humans often destroy what we are afraid of or things that make us uncomfortable. Perhaps you have taken a shoe to a spider or cockroach to make sure it was good and dead, never to scare you or gross you out again. I have many times felt the full satisfaction of smashing a mosquito that was biting me or buzzing around in my tent waiting to suck my blood. Likewise it is satisfying to smash a fat fly that has been landing on all the food at a picnic or driving me crazy with its buzzing around my head on a hot day as I’m trying to concentrate. I felt great satisfaction catching the rat that did $2000 of damage to my truck’s engine wiring. Destruction and death is final and relieving even though these creatures are amazing little bits of nature’s engineering and were actually enjoying their brief lives. I can’t say I am proud to have felt this way but its true none-the-less. More typically I don’t particularly enjoy killing things but I have dispatched hundreds of mice, rats, and moths without feeling badly after they destroyed a great many of my favorite sweaters, blankets, socks, and food supplies at home and on my land. Some of these were treasures from my travels and I never even got a chance to use them before they were ravaged by so called vermin.

Yet we all know there is a darker side to destruction that is often not neutral or healthy in any way at all. We humans are often amazingly good at deliberately destroying relationships with other people because deep down we are afraid of intimacy or the possibility that someone is getting too close. Susan (not her real name) was a client of mine who complained she could not keep a relationship. After getting to know her and helping her look at this very closely it became quite evident that she was a master relationship destroyer. There was nothing wrong with the guys she dated. In fact she attracted some really good conscious and aware men who were quite good to her.  Yet at a certain point in the relationship, when closeness was developing, she found ways to trash the relationship. She made sure it would go no farther by severing it for some made up slight or simply ghosting the relationship by disappearing and not calling them back. How many of us have done that without realizing exactly why?

As we probed deeper and she began to see the pattern she admitted that she was deeply frightened of the intimacy developing and her possible loss of freedom. She would develop these poor excuses like, he is too young or too old, doesn’t make enough money, works too much, isn’t tall enough, has a weird way of squinting, is too ethnic, too white, is starting to get a receding hairline and on and on. She saw that she was an expert at eventually disqualifying every man on the planet. Eventually she saw that she was afraid because if she let them get close and they rejected her she would be devastated and so she chose to reject them first.

Everyone has unconscious patterns that run their behavior and often create events that lead to suffering and discontent. These dysfunctional patterns tend to end up running the show until we consciously dismantle them. The false personality or ego is always responsible for creating these patterns because it is constantly trying to create painful emotions that it likes to consume. The false personality thrives by creating pain and it grows bigger and stronger the more food it has to eat exactly like a parasite. So it arranges these scenarios by instilling fear into the personality and then creating behaviors that seek to escape the fear and seek comfort. That is what is behind most destructive impulses. It finds an area of vulnerability and begins to work it like microbes around a wound, leading to infection. It may say, “Better watch out, you are going to get hurt here. This guy or this gal is going to stab you in the back. They will be unfaithful and will leave you etc.” so the personality begins to consider this possibility and compares it with actual episodes in the past where something like this happened that was very painful or unpleasant. Perhaps it was an event from childhood or years past. How long ago and with whom doesn’t matter at all. So the personality begins to mobilize to move away from potential pain and toward safety or comfort. This is the oldest trick in the book the false personality is using to get a meal. If it can succeed in destroying something like a relationship it knows that down the road there will be suffering because of isolation and loneliness and then it wins.

The false personality likes to masquerade as something delicious and it often uses sadism to get its way. Let’s say you meet someone who seems to be a very fine person and you have a number of encounters that are very satisfying. Simple interest begins to turn into something deeper.  Then that person voices an opinion that is ambiguous perhaps about a politician or some new legislation regarding taxes, a religious viewpoint, or an event in the news. Normally this might create some simple curiosity as far as knowing what the person was getting at. This might lead to a discussion allowing both people to get to know their more private viewpoints or values. However the false personality simply reacts with suspicion and immediately creates conflict without bothering with clarification. It may respond with, “How can you say that. Only idiots believe that. What’s the matter with you anyway.” Suddenly the relationship is on the rocks without even a discussion. Unfortunately this happens every day. When someone is afraid of intimacy they find judgment, conflict, and insult absolutely delicious. They are suddenly off the hook for anything proceeding further.

Essence wants relationship. Essence wants intimacy and closeness. Essence desires forgiveness, compassion, love, patience, nurturing and emotions that lead to coherence. The false personality likes conflict, hurt feelings, betrayal, judgment, slander, shame, guilt, and anger. These emotions lack coherence. So the choice is easy to see once you know this. Essence choices lead to the creation of coherence. False personality choices lead to the destruction of coherence. To understand someone just look and see which way they are going: toward coherence or toward incoherence. To understand yourself, use the same criteria. Is your behavior leading to coherence of not, creativity or destruction?

What is so sad is that the minute essence shows up in a relationship, many people take that as a sign to run for their lives. Nothing is more frightening to younger souls than the presence of essence. That is why they tend to avoid eye contact for any length of time. A quick glance is about as much as they can tolerate.

All types of people are capable of destruction but older souls are much better at destroying themselves rather than others. Artisans and sages, servers and priests, warriors and kings, and even scholars are perfectly capable of wreaking havoc and leaving a wake of destruction behind them.  Artisans are perhaps the most interested in destruction because it is the back side of creativity which they are so good at. Any of you who have seen the film “A Star is Born” got a close hand look at the process of self destruction in a very talented person. This hits home for a lot of people because who has not dabbled in self-destruction at times in their lives?

There are also time frames on the planet that are much more conducive to destruction than other more peaceful times. During these more destructive phases wars easily break out, people behave more aggressively and violently and act more destructively than usual. Whole corporations may be toppled (Boeing?), systems of checks and balances (USA), religious structures (the Catholic Church) social structures (Venezuela and the USA), financial systems (Britain and the European union) and we could go on and on here. According to the Aztec calendar we are at the very tail end of the 5th sun (ending in 1991) and the very beginning of the 6th sun (starting 2021) with the time in between as overlap.  These Aztec suns are associated with the rotation of our solar system around the Pleiades that is in turn rotating around the galaxy. They count the suns based on where our sun is in this rotation. It is totally mathematical. So all the suns are actually different positions of our sun as it moves through space. If you don’t understand this don’t worry, it is not necessary to understand this in order to benefit from its impact.

The 5th sun or light sun was an era of externalization whereby people looked outside of themselves for answers. During this long period, humans tried to dominate and control nature for their own ends. The 6th sun is called the dark sun. During periodic dark suns lasting thousands of years, humankind turns within and seeks answers inside themselves.

During these sequences mother-nature takes charge and humans have to adapt to her. All hope of dominating her goes out the window. Dark suns are more enlightened and conscious than light suns. In 2021 the overlap period is over and we will be completely under the influence of the new dark sun. This basically means that the ways and means of the recent light sun are destroyed, erased, and done for.  The influence of the new dark sun will ascend and take over quickly.  Of course it will take some time for this to become the new paradigm all over the earth. What it does mean is that any attempts to do things by the old rules will be disastrous and will simply not work out. Any attempts to violate nature and go against her well-being will be catastrophic. She will teach us rapidly. The stage is being prepared for the younger souls to learn very harsh lessons and yes that means that the older souls will have to have patience and may have to endure some of the hardship as well. When the kids playing with matches burn the house down, the parents have to rebuild and that may not always be so easy.

These processes are cyclical and created for long-term lessons and growth. Destruction is part of these cycles, is part of the dynamics of this universe. Black holes swallow suns and solar systems in order to refresh them. Suns go nova and destroy all the planets around them. Destruction is everywhere but as we all know so is creativity. Death is followed by birth is followed by death in an infinite recycling process that includes all of nature. Our bodies decay and die with everything else but our essences are aligned with the mighty I Am presence that is immortal. So destruction is local just as a screwdriver or drill is local. It is just a tool we use to learn our lessons. It can lead us to suffering temporarily or it can lead us to freedom. The choice is ours to make in these turbulent times.

José Stevens PhD is an international lecturer, corporate team builder and organizational coach, consultant and trainer. A psychologist, licensed clinical social worker and author of more than twenty books and numerous articles, he is also co-editor for A Journal of Contemporary Shamanism and a board member of the Society for Shamanic Practitioners. He is the founder, with his wife Lena, of the Power Path School of Shamanism and The Center for Shamanic Education and Exchange, a non-profit organization dedicated to educating youth in indigenous cultures. He has completed a ten-year apprenticeship with a Huichol Maracame in Mexico and has studied with the Shipibos of the Amazon and the Paqos of the Andes for the last thirty years.
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