A+ A A-

The Surprising Lesson I Learned After a Friendship Breakup

The Surprising Lesson I Learned After a Friendship Breakup

Last year I went through a pretty difficult break-up, with one of my best friends. Break-ups are hard, no matter the circumstance, but this one really stung, and to make matters worse, I never really fully understood why we had a falling out (I was completely ghosted).

Like with any break in a close relationship, you go through all the possible feelings. The anger, the doubt, the guilt, the sadness, the regret, and then finally, the acceptance. I found acceptance in the fact that a relationship that I valued so much, is no longer, but truthfully, it’s been a long journey.

The interesting thing about feeling really grounded in acceptance, is that life tends to present you a lesson, to really see just how settled you are with it.

Recently, I was in a social setting, where someone who I didn’t know, randomly, and completely unprompted, starting raving about my former friend. I stood there, stunned, and listened. I heard how well she’s doing, how inspiring she is, and how incredibly kind she was to this person. And, let me tell you, I didn’t like it one bit.

It was so hard to swallow, I didn’t love to hear just how well this person, who hurt me so deeply, was doing in her life. I wanted so badly to interject the “if you really know the whole story” thing, but I just kept my mouth shut, and let out a controlled, “wow, that’s really nice” in response.

Inside, I was a mess. I was rattled and disappointed, and I really had to sit with myself and figure out why I was so upside down that this person’s success made me feel this way.  Did I want her to fail? To not be okay? To be a mess without me in her life? Truthfully, initially, yes. (Not proud to admit that).

I really didn’t like putting so much energy towards hoping someone would fail, which is exactly the surprising lesson I learned, in this moment, about friends and break-ups.

Just because a relationship didn’t work out for you, and your energy, and your life, doesn’t mean that person has to fail in other relationships, and in life, moving forward. I realized this, it does me no good, to harbor ill will, towards someone who has no representation in my life. And truthfully, don’t we all, deep down want people to succeed? And to be kind? And to be liked? Don’t we want society to be good? Even if it means rooting for people who have wronged us (from afar)?

The world is hard enough, cruel enough, difficult enough as it is, for us to be wishing for other people’s failures. In fact, I started to think, if everyone wished ill will on someone from their past, we all would be cursing each other for eternity, and I just don’t think we need that in this day and age.

My lesson from this was simple. I can honor my former friend’s accomplishments, achievements, and successes, from a distance. I can let the feelings move through me and I can find happiness when someone else is doing good in the world, even if that means that person isn’t doing good by me. Because it’s 2020, and we all know that toxic negativity is ever present, and if we all can find some space in our hearts to root for all of us, we might feel, and be a bit better and happier.

Here’s to all of us rooting for each other.

xo,

Michelle

logo2Michelle Maros is Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life's Creative Director and resident writer. She has a degree in Journalism from Indiana University and is also a certified holistic health coach through the Institute for Integrative Nutrition and registered yoga teacher with trainings with Anuttara Yoga Shala and Strala Yoga. Michelle has a deep desire to help people find happiness in all areas of their lives, and truly believes the Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life movement will bring lasting change to the world. Michelle splits her time between Florida and New York City and loves connecting with people from all over the world. If you'd like to contact her, she can be reached at 
Source Here

CrystalWind.ca is free to access and use.
Please donate a small gift of $11.11 or $22.22 or $33.33. 
Thank you! 
ॐ Namasté - Blessings!
"Life is an echo, what you send out comes back."

© 2008-2020 crystalwind.ca. All rights reserved.

  Please buy us a coffee!
 
 
Pin It

Featured Writers

Featured This Month

Page:

Libra Mythology

Libra Mythology

It's truly impossible to talk about Libra mythology without also referencing... Read more

Libra’s Featured Stone - Kyanite

Libra’s Featured Stone - Kyanite

Kyanite Birthstone: Libra Planet: Venus Element: Air Chakra: Throat Read more

Ametrine

Ametrine

The Stone for Clearing and Change Ametrine is one of the rarest and most va... Read more

Crystals and Stones for Halloween

Crystals and Stones for Halloween

Halloween is one of the most fun, spooky, mysterious and frightening times o... Read more

Bats - Myths, Folklore and Facts

Bats - Myths, Folklore and Facts

Bats “Suspicions amongst thoughts are like bats amongst birds, they ever ... Read more

Libra

Libra

Sept 23 - Oct 22 Spirit: To operate judiciously Ego: Strategist, peace see... Read more

Mullein

Mullein

Helps you feel courageous and adventurous. Gender: Feminine Planet: Saturn Ele... Read more

Samhain - Halloween

Samhain - Halloween

Samhain is one of the greater Sabbats of the Witches’ calendar and in the No... Read more

Ducks Fly Moon

Ducks Fly Moon

Raven - Bloodstone Jasper - Mullein - Brown September 23 to October 23 The D... Read more

Samhain by The Hedgewitch

Samhain by The Hedgewitch

Blessed Samhain Samhain marks one of the two great doorways of the year, fo... Read more

Samhain Lore

Samhain Lore

The symbolism of this Sabbat is that of The Third (and final) Harvest, it ma... Read more

12 White Witch Spells For Autumn

12 White Witch Spells For Autumn

Add these 12 essential spells to your arsenal of magic, thanks to Tu... Read more

Sun in Libra

Sun in Libra

An Overview of Sun Sign Characteristics for Libra The ruler of Libra is Ven... Read more

Lepidolite

Lepidolite

The Mental Balancer Stone Lepidolite contains lithium and is helpful for st... Read more

Birth Totem - Raven or Crow

Birth Totem - Raven or Crow

Birth dates: September 22 - October 22 Birth Totem is: Raven/Crow Clan ... Read more

© 2008-2020 CrystalWind.ca. Site Creation by CreativeInceptions.com.
X

Right Click

No right click