You probably have experienced someone trying to ride on your coat-tails either financially or emotionally. Maybe it used to be something you enjoyed, or thought was your responsibility. You thought that your service to humanity was in that capacity. To hold energies for others and for the planet.  But you may have noticed that it no longer feels right.

Recently, someone accused me of flushing a 16 year friendship into the loo.

Ouch! Well played, guilt. But the score still stands, guilt, 0, Maria, 1.

I stopped taking the heat for other people’s response to something I may have said or done.

It’s liberating.

Because there is no such thing as being the victim. People can play victim and they do, but there really are no victims. Everyone is responsible for their own creations.

If someone feels rebuffed by something I may have said or done I am not responsible for that. At this stage of my enlightenment, I am not capable of hurting anyone. I’m not in a consciousness in which I would intentionally try to hurt someone physically or emotionally. So if they feel hurt, it’s only because they were already feeling hurt. They were already feeling bad.

They brought the situation to themselves just as much as I created my version of that situation. They need to ask themselves, why did I create this? Is this a pattern of mine? Why am I feeling like a victim? What do I get out of being a victim?

And, if I allow myself to take the heat, and begin to feel responsible or guilty, I need to ask myself the same questions.

So I no longer accept responsibility for making others feel good or bad. It is not my job to make others feel accepted and loved. It is not up to me to make them feel more comfortable. That is their job.

I don’t mind being supportive. But I don’t have the time or the energy to hold anyone’s hand. That’s their job. They can hold their hand, or better yet, ask their soul to hold their hand.

I have worked long and hard to get to where I am today. I will not allow anyone to ride on my coat-tails. That’s not my job. I will not bail anyone out financially or emotionally. That’s not my job.

If someone wants to be in my life, they, for the most part are going to have to be self-loving, self-sufficient, and sovereign. They will have to be responsible for their own joy. They will have to learn to love and accept themselves just as they are. That is not something I can do for them. I have better things to do with my time.

And if they are not willing to feed from their own trough, my time with them is limited.

I will share who I am with others, and I will enjoy them and hopefully they will enjoy me. We will be coming together as two self-loving, self-fulfilled beings.

We may ask each other for assistance at times using our own unique skill sets, but it won’t be in the capacity of nurturing or hand-holding.

We will bring out the best in each other. Good relationships, whether they are friendships, or mates, are not something that need to be worked at, they either work or they don’t. They flow, or they don’t.

They may be life-long, or last a week, or something in between. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is, if it becomes less than joyful, it’s a sign.

That may sound harsh, but it’s much harsher to your body, your soul and your mind to perpetuate something that no longer serves you.

And holding energies for anyone is no longer serving you, not if you are wanting to move into your enlightenment and your freedom. Processing energies for the planet…..not going to do.

That is being done by others now. It’s not your job. You’ve retired from that job. Take the gold watch and get yourself out of there.

Others are there now to pick up where you left off. For them, holding energies is just where they need to be.

LABOR PAINS ARE NO LONGER NECESSARY

And as women, we now know that it’s been in our DNA to take on the wounds of humanity. And that has come to an end. There may still be a small part of us that holds onto the need to be in pain, as a service to humanity.

A part of us that believes we must go through labor pains in order to birth our Christ Consciousness. That a good woman is one who serves by being uncomfortable, so that others can be more comfortable.

And as women, there is still a part of us that is reluctant to be our full, embodied selves because we were not treated with respect for being that self in the past.

We have been reluctant, then, to be our sensual selves.

But now, as men and women on the forefront of this change, we need to embrace our sensuality fully. We are not going to become enlightened here in these bodies otherwise.

This is an undertaking that is extraordinary. It’s never been done like this before. It requires all of our attention and our devotion. Not from our minds, not from our brain but from our heart and our body.

The devotion required from our mind is to be in service to our heart, body and soul. Not to be in charge. Big difference.

So, if anyone is riding on your coat-tails, you will know it. And if you make the choice to set them free, they have also made the choice to be set free, on some level. They may not realize it consciously but they, too are creating their reality.