Support crystalwind.ca with your donation and help spread spirituality and positivity. Blessings!

This article was posted by CrystalWind.ca

A+ A A-

Are Empaths Really Controlled by Shame?

Are Empaths Really Controlled by Shame?

One thing that causes many Empaths incredible insecurity and suffering is the shame bought on by judgement.

Fearing the judgements of others, as well as the judgements we place on ourselves, has kept many of us imprisoned more than we probably realize.

We could say we are controlled by shame.

Until we recognize the shame we carry, and how it impacts our behaviour, we will continue to alter our behaviour patterns to fit in with others’ expectations, and not be true to ourselves.

Now, you may want to say that you have no shame, and you are not controlled by the judgements of others. But think about that for a minute. Is that true?

The thing is, Empaths tend to over care about everything and anything. We can easily worry about how our words might have accidentally offended someone, or how our actions may have been misinterpreted. All of which could contribute to the feelings of shame. Especially if we feel we have unintentionally hurt someone.

The fear of judgement not only hinders our authenticity, but it might also push us to alter our opinions and beliefs to align with mainstream narratives, so we don’t cause offence.

Living as a people pleaser or the nice guy may seem like the best way to keep the peace, but if we are being untrue to ourselves in these actions, we are simply holding ourselves back.

The fact that the world has been pretty much built on lies is obviously going to impact our behaviour. Being Empaths, who pick up on the energy around us, especially for those of us who tend to morph, we cannot help but be affected by judgmental energy. But that doesn’t mean we should not continue to live as authentically as we can.

To live more sincerely, we have to face our truth and this means recognizing how the fear of rejection, shame, and a desire to fit-in has altered our actions and ideas.

How This Works

The fear of judgment and rejection work hand-in-hand

When we don’t share the truth of who we are, for the fear of being judged or causing offence, we end up burying parts of ourself.

For example, as Empaths, we might not want to share our ‘Empathic traits’ because it gives reason for others to judge and reject. Or we may hold back from sharing our real opinions for fear of causing offence.

Those of us who are Sensitive, feel the judgements of others, even when unsaid or hidden behind fake positivity. If these judgments trigger buried feelings of insecurity, which then cause old wounds to reopen, we will work even harder to avoid being judged. Which often means locking ourselves down.

Human Nature

Now, I do realize that as humans, judgements are systematically threaded in to our core. Even if it is just to assess whether a certain person is safe or trustworthy.

Assessing a situation or person, for safety reasons, is normal, and can prevent unnecessary suffering. However, living in fear of being judged not only makes us afraid of speaking our truth, but we might also hide our creative side for being shamed about not being good enough.

Our gifts then stay hidden away and we don’t allow new ideas in.

Controlled by Shame for a Reason

We all carry emotional pain that is often locked up in shame. By its manipulation, good people are controlled by the powers that be. They pigeon hole us. Telling us we need to follow the same agenda, have the same opinions and education.

But, as I’ve said many times before, we are all different, with different outlooks and needs.

We are supposed to have freedom of speech and thought, but we really don’t. Those who don’t fit in, or those who have a differing opinion or beliefs than the mainstream, are often vilified or shamed in some way by those who want everyone to be the same.

No one wants the agony that is triggered by the humiliation of being singled out as a weirdo. And this is what those followers of the conventional life like to do to anyone who appears different. This is why so many Sensitive people live in the fear of exposing the truth of who they are, and it is what holds many Empaths back.

Shame is a massive controller.

I believe a big reason why Empaths freeze around inauthenticity is because it’s a constant reminder that fakery and pretense does not promote growth, especially when it is used for exploitation.

As Empaths, we may carry humiliation over one thing or another, but we also know how wrong it is to control others through shame or manipulation.

Looking from Another Perspective

Now, just because we have experienced humiliations in life does not mean we cannot use them to our own advantage.

Those who faced the biggest adversities in life, especially after facing judgements and discriminations, and came out on top, are the ones who have the most incredible life stories to share.

Yes, their journey may have been painful, it may have been overcoming one thing after another, but their experiences also created exponential growth and success.

Take for example, the person who came from an underprivileged or difficult background who clambered their way through life, overcoming adversity and disapproval to find happiness and true contentment, will have a far more interesting and rewarding life than the one born with a silver spoon, who had everything handed to them on a plate, with no real challenges to face.

We have always had success dictated. People are judged on levels of achievement by their perceived wealth, house size, car and wardrobe. But true success should be measured by levels of contentment, as well as hurdles faced and overcome.

Let’s face it, the only thing we get to take with us when this life is over are our experiences, and that includes emotional experiences.

We earn our rewards through putting the work in, and we gain understanding through life experience and challenges faced.

Humans don’t grow and gain understanding from having it easy and having no lessons.

I’m not saying that emotional pain should be a goal to strive towards. But having emotional discomforts and hardships can give us motivation and momentum to push ourselves up, out and beyond.

If we continue to follow the herd, because it is the easy route, and it is the best way to avoid shame and judgements, we are simply trapping our unique spark and following a road that leads to unfulfillment and regret.

Surrender Judgements

If, as an Empath, you want to live a life away from judgements and shame, it helps to really know your worth. Accept that the past may have caused emotional pain and discomfort for the reason it offered obstacles to overcome.

And it really is ok to be different.

Know that if you have suffered and struggled and strived to live authentically you are doing something right.

We may not know the shape of things to come or where our future will lead, but I really feel it is time to surrender our fears, beliefs and old ways of being.

Let go of the fear of shame, and instead focus on the light within.

It is time to create the new and become the best version of you!

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time.


Diane lives in Manchester, UK. She spent the past twenty years researching everything from human anatomy to the law of attraction. She is a qualified colour and crystal therapist, massage therapist, reflexologist, aromatherapist, healing practitioner, yoga and meditation teacher, and has done in-depth research into diet and nutrition and how it affects Sensitive people.. ©Diane Kathrine

7 secrets   Empath Power  Super Powered Empath


Posting on CrystalWind.ca ©2024. All rights reserved. Please do not reproduce any content without written permission. The article's title was crafted by CrystalWind.ca.

Pin It

© CrystalWind.ca 2024. All content (articles, imagery, fair use) & design protected. Written permission required for copying. All rights reserved.

Join the Conversation Now! Comment Below! arrow down small 11

CrystalWind.ca is free to use because of donations from people like you. Please help support us! 

Follow this blog

Featured Writers

Cut Through The Illusions!
Available On
Apple  | Android | Amazon
NEW Expanded Version - 53 cards!

Spirit Animal Totem Of The Day!

CrystalWind.ca is free to use because of
donations from people like you.
Donate Now »

CrystalWind.ca Donation!

Unlock Your Light: Join Lightworkers Worldwide on CrystalWind.ca!


Follow Us!


Who is Online Now

We have 16681 guests and no members online

Featured This Month


Gemini Mythology

Gemini Mythology

The Story Behind the Gemini Zodiac Sign Read more



The Divine Listener Stone Celestite has remarkable relaxing and uplifting a... Read more



Litha Ritual Celebrated on the Summer Solstice, around June 21st each year. ... Read more



Helps you create the future of your dreams Read more

Summer Solstice: The Sacred Marriage of Heav…

Summer Solstice: The Sacred Marriage of Heaven and Earth

Summer Solstice is the longest day of the year, and stands opposite the Wint... Read more

Birth Totem - Deer

Birth Totem - Deer

Birth dates: May 21 - June 20 Birth Totem is: Deer Read more

Dowsing With Your Pendulum

Dowsing With Your Pendulum

Einstein's famous equation, E = MC2, equates energy and matter. All living... Read more

Litha - The Midsummer Solstice

Litha - The Midsummer Solstice

The Litha festival is one of the lesser Sabbats of the Witches annual calend... Read more



The Clearing Stone Citrine’s wide range of colours enables it to help balan... Read more

Litha Sabbat - The Summer Solstice

Litha Sabbat - The Summer Solstice

Gardens are blooming, and summer is in full swing. Fire up the barbeque, turn ... Read more

Sun in Gemini

Sun in Gemini

Sun in Gemini May 21 through June 20 An Overview of Sun Sign Characteristic... Read more

Cornplanting Moon

Cornplanting Moon

Deer – Moss Agate – Yarrow – Green and White Read more

Rutilated Quartz

Rutilated Quartz

The Energy Buster Stone Rutilated Quartz is an illuminator for the soul, pr... Read more

The Meaning Of The Letter X On The Palms Of …

The Meaning Of The Letter X On The Palms Of Your Hands!

Its not Palmistry or any superstitious method coming from India. This is a v... Read more

© 2008-2024 CrystalWind.ca. All rights reserved. Site Creation by CrystalWind.ca.
Web Hosting by Knownhost.com




Right Click

No right click