Have Your Own Back

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Monday, 19 September 2022

Written by Cheryl Richardson

Sometimes we gain wisdom from the most unexpected places. Last week I had my buttons pushed when I stumbled upon an exchange on Facebook about my work.

Two women were discussing the release of my new audio program, “Self Care for the Wisdom Years,” and they made a few assumptions about me that were incorrect. And they weren’t very kind about it.

Normally I brush those things off. I’ve been at this a long time and I know better than to take things personally. But, I’m human, and having birthed a new baby I naturally felt more vulnerable and in that state it was easy to overreact.

After reading their comments, I felt compelled to reply and correct their mistakes (compelled being the operative word here). Fortunately, because I was upset, I knew better than to do so. Instead, I walked away from the computer, made myself some lunch, and turned on an episode of Madam Secretary – a favorite TV series.

About halfway into the episode, the character who plays the Secretary’s Communication Director was anxiously trying to get the Secretary to respond to a reporter who was maligning her work. “No,” said the Secretary repeatedly. “I’m not going to address it.” When pushed further, she exclaimed firmly:

“I am not going to respond. If you feed the beast, it just gets hungrier.”

Upon hearing her words, I felt the muscles in my body relax. Well there you have it, I thought to myself. The perfect intervention. No need to add fuel to the fire.

I smiled, thanked the Secretary, shut off the TV, and finished eating my lunch. Then, I went to my journal and wrote the following:

Misunderstandings
Judgments
Opinions
Frustration
Fear

DON’T FEED THE BEAST.

Wise advice to remember. When you choose self-regulation over drama you’re no longer at the mercy of the outer world. Instead, you have your own back.

And that’s self-love in action.

Love,
Cheryl

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Cheryl Richardson
For the last twenty-five years I’ve dedicated my life to the practice of self-care because it’s good for people and it’s good for the planet. From personal experience, as well as coaching a diverse group of clients, I’ve come to understand that when we care deeply for ourselves, we naturally begin to care for others – our families, our friends, the environment, and the whole world – in a healthier and more effective way.