There’s a Great Quote from Blaise Pascal

“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”

I believe there’s a lot of truth in that. And I believe that in this quote lies the key to living a simple life. Hear me out!

What Happens If You Can’t Sit Alone

Let’s first talk about how the quote is true …

If you are unable to sit quietly in a room alone, then we can imagine:

• You’ll always need to be entertained, distracted, busy — which is why many people are addicted to distraction, their phones, and busyness.
• If you’re having stress or unhappiness, you’ll need to numb yourself out, because your feelings of sadness or stress will be too uncomfortable to handle.
• You’ll need to find ways to get pleasure externally — from online shopping, video games, watching TV or videos, social media, food, drugs, alcohol, etc.
• Because of all of the above, you’ll likely be spending too much money and have difficulty with finances; your health might be worse; your life will be overwhelming.

I think whole books could be written on the kind of life that this would lead to, but I’m hoping you get the idea by now.

The Simplicity of Being Comfortable with Yourself

So now let’s imagine you developed the capacity to be alone with yourself and be comfortable. What would result from that?

Simplicity.

Here’s what I’ve noticed happens if you can become comfortable being alone in quiet:

• You don’t need very much — no need for a bunch of possessions, shopping, fancy things.
• You don’t need to be entertained all the time, so life can be simpler.
• You are more content, less in need of comforting (not that comfort is a bad thing).
• You’re better at emotionally regulating yourself when things are chaotic, which keeps things at a simpler, more even keel.

Life just becomes simpler when you develop this capacity.

How to Learn to Be Comfortable with Yourself

This capacity comes with practice. And the practice can be fairly simple (though not always comfortable).

Here’s how you can practice:

• Spend a little time each day on your own, without technology or distractions. Think of this as meditative time.
• Notice your discomfort or urge to do something productive, distracting, entertaining.
• Take a few breaths when this discomfort comes up. Let yourself stay in it for a minute. See if you can relax a bit.
• Ask yourself if there’s anything in this moment that you can be curious about. Anything fascinating, anything to learn, anything to be grateful for? Find wonder and play and joy in a moment like this.
• Give yourself time to reflect on your life, meditatively. If any bad feelings about yourself come up, let yourself breathe through that, and give yourself some compassion. Reflect on the thoughts that come up that make you feel bad about yourself, and investigate and question them.

Over time, you can grow more comfortable sitting with yourself. You might get bored, which is OK too — let yourself experience boredom!

But you can also find ways to entertain yourself. Reflect on what you’re grateful for. Reflect on your deeper purpose. Reflect on your learnings. Play games with yourself. Tell yourself stories. Let yourself play.

By the way, you don’t always have to sit in stillness. I think it’s useful to sit in stillness, but going for a walk with no purpose, or doing a little movement around the room, or some stretching, can all be a part of your practice.

Final Reflection

What kind of simplicity would you like in your life? How might this practice help create that for you?

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