Don’t Go Along With The Popular If Its Not Right For You

Wednesday, 28 June 2023 Written by Julie Lomas

At this present time the world is in a great state of flux and change, lives and attitudes to life are changing.

Much of the change has been forced on us all whether we like it or not.  The world is indeed a very different place in many ways after the covid virus pandemic, it has been a catalyst of immense magnitude.

There are many complex things happening all over the world, and it is at times very uncomfortable indeed as old ways fall away being replaced with new directions and ways of doing things.

Just because an idea or way of doing things is popular doesn’t mean it’s right for everyone. However, part of the way that something becomes popular is that many of us don’t take the time to determine what’s right for us; we simply do what most of the people we know are doing. It’s easier that way, it causes no fuss, or even thought process because ‘’If they are doing it then it must be ok for me too’’. Or they don’t like the abuse they get when they speak out about things they see and don’t like or don’t make sense to them. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, after all everyone usually has one, however these days it seems that if you speak out or say your opinion and it doesn’t seem to be the opinion of those who shout loudest then often the abuse is quite traumatic, particularly on social media, so people stay quiet go along with the rest and quietly seethe inside and apathy sets in.

Thinking or acting this way, means our decisions about life are made by default, which means they aren’t what we call conscious decisions.

There may be other options available, but we don’t always take the time to think about them or research them.
This could be because we feel overwhelmed or pressured by family, peers, social media and humanity at large, to do things their way, the way things have always been done, or the new way of how things now in their minds should be done. Often you don’t even have chance to think your own thoughts, or speak them because the repercussions could be uncomfortable.

There are always rights and wrongs on every side of an argument, ideal, movement, whatever the cause.
Regardless of the cause, it is important that, as often as we can, we decide for ourselves what to do with our lives and our thoughts rather than just drift along on the current of popular opinion.
Read and research out facts about anything you are being pressured or feel you should do, or should be thinking. Do what feels right for you.

It is not always easy to make decisions that go against the grain. Many people feel threatened when those close to them make choices different from the ones they are making.
Friends may feel abandoned if we decide to change our habits or behaviour. Or don’t go a long with their new ideals, or thoughts or even actions.

Meanwhile, on your side of the fence, it’s easy to feel frustrated and defensive when we feel unsupported and misunderstood simply because we are thinking for ourselves. It can be exhausting to have to explain and re-explain our points of view and our reasons. In fact you should not have to.

This is where gentleness, openness, respect and tolerance come into play. It helps if we are calmly persistent, consistent and clear as we communicate to those around us why we are making the choices we are making.
At the same time, we have the right to say that we are tired of talking about it and simply need our choices to be respected. Both sides of any situation need to be respected.

Our lives and thoughts belong to us and so do our decisions.
Those who truly love us will stand by us and support our choices, even if not their choice, never mind what’s popular.

Respect each other and all things and most importantly BE KIND to yourself and to all others

Best wishes

Julie x

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